Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....