actually, I'm a sock model
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
