girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
