you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I just googled if crying burns calories
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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