i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize