You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
only you would photoshop your dick
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
