its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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