her vagine was all disorganized.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
