I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize