Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize