Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
