I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
