Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
