Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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