Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
