the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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