I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
