That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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