So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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