He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
