So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Randomize
