Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
