Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
My liver just broke up with me...
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize