just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
