It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
