You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Randomize
