I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize
