That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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