These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize