Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
