Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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