it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
