I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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