Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
