Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
