sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
My bed smells like the plague
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
