guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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