It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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