Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
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so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
There's always time for handjobs
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
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In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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