I cockslap morals
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.