I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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