Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
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