i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize