Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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