OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
