are you still at the devil's house?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
