Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
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He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
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