But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
