Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
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