hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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