I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
